So here I am starting this post.  Honestly, I don’t know what the intention is, but I have a few ideas and I want to write them down for my peace of mind.

I guess I can start with “what does peace of mind mean to me?” I want my mind to be silent and content just for a moment.  In the past 2 months I have been having a lot of thoughts running through my head and they have been overwhelming me. Everything around career, family, relationships, money, debt, and mental health.  Don’t forget about diet and drinking water.

As I classify myself as “the doer” the first thing I do when my brain starts running is ask how I can solve this problem or thought.  So of course, I will research the heck out of the topic and watch 1001 YouTube videos.  Yes, I still watch YouTube videos and I love them.

I then feel overwhelmed with how much information on the internet there is around everything and anything.  The information overload that I experience is jarring.  I end up not solving anything.  And feeling less accomplished and more overwhelmed.

Today I was driving to work and was thinking about how I could help myself put it on paper to forget about it.

I started to remember when I was younger, 9 to 13 years old, I used to write down any thoughts I had as letters.  It started with negative thoughts, I would write it down and would let my brain continue to write.  I would finish and fold my letter and place it in an envelope and seal it, as if I was sealing and forgetting anything and everything I wrote.  Over time I was able to gather so many letters that I filled my Lisa Frank pink and purple suitcase.  My suitcase became full of secrets, emotions, and memories.  I must give credit to my sister, initially the beautiful Lisa Frank suitcase belonged to her, it was a hand me down.

In 2014, I started writing on OneNote on my phone.  Again, I started with negative thoughts and emotions.  I was never consistent.  My OneNote entries stop in 2020.  I can scroll through the page, read, and feel the emotions I had then.  With some I can see how much I’ve grown and with others how much I haven’t.  I can also read about what worried me back then and know I haven’t stopped worrying about some of the same things.  

So, this is how I want to start. I want to write down my thoughts and share them.  I don’t expect anyone to read them.  I just want to release them from my brain click on the publish button and forget anything and everything I wrote.  It will be my online Lisa Frank pink and purple suitcase.